About Buttkraken
A small studio, with a long shadow.
Buttkraken is a web design agency of five full-time humans and, depending on whom you ask, one consultant who may or may not be a crow. We have been quietly shipping websites since 2011 from an address we would rather not disclose.
Our history
Buttkraken was founded in the summer of 2011 by Wendell P. Throckmorton, who, while attempting to purchase a new cordless drill online, became convinced that 'the internet deserves better.' He has since refused to elaborate.
We take on no more than twelve clients a year. We do not blog. We do not speak at conferences. We do not produce content for LinkedIn. What we do, occasionally, is release a website so exquisitely crafted that our clients forward the analytics dashboard to their therapists.
We are proud to have been named 'Most Promising Small Agency' by a publication that folded three months after publishing the list.
Mission
To build websites of such enduring craft that the businesses behind them are mistaken for older, more serious institutions — and, occasionally, for cults.
The Cabal
Five people. Possibly six.
Every project at Buttkraken is touched by each member of the team. This is not a sales pitch; it is a warning.
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Wendell P. Throckmorton
Founder & Cephalopod-in-Chief
Wendell founded Buttkraken in the summer of 2011 after what he describes only as 'a disappointing trip to Branson, Missouri.' He holds no formal credentials in web design but has, by his own count, built over one hundred websites, forty-two of which still exist. He considers himself a father figure to the team, and, on Tuesdays, a mother figure.
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Gretta Plumb-Lansing
Principal Architect of Beautiful Interfaces
Gretta grew up in a lighthouse in coastal Maine and credits her sense of layout to 'the unblinking rhythm of the sea.' She speaks only in CSS Grid and has never pushed a commit before 3 a.m. Her favorite color is pistachio. Her second favorite color is also pistachio. She does not use Figma and she will not be taking questions.
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Dr. Randall Steinmeier-Cobb, PhD
Head of Search Engine Alchemy
Dr. Steinmeier-Cobb earned his doctorate at an online university no one has ever heard of. His dissertation, 'Long-Tail Keywords and the Erosion of the Self,' is available upon request in mimeographed form. He is fluent in three languages, two of which are Perl. Clients love him because he returns emails within the calendar year.
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Mindy Von Kellerman
Director of Brand Moods & Graphic Sensations
Mindy studied color at the Rhode Island School of Design and moods at the Iowa Writers' Workshop. She was briefly a competitive equestrian. Her logos have been called 'memorable,' 'confident,' and 'larger than they need to be.' She would like you to know she does not do NFTs, but she will consider it for the right client.
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Bram Oglethorpe, Esq.
Senior Engineer, Client Whisperer, Licensed in Two States
Bram passed the bar in 1998, forgot which one, and has been engineering websites ever since. He writes his TypeScript in a leather-bound notebook and transcribes it to a keyboard at the end of each week. He is the only member of the team who owns a printer. Please do not ask him to print anything for you.
Currently accepting inquiries
We have room for two more clients this year. Possibly one.
If you believe your project might be a fit, we would love to hear from you. We respond to every inquiry within ten business days, or, in rare cases, sooner.
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